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Can you guess what's in the middle?

You can right? >< (If not, the answer is yourself.)

You have 4 different things (at least) putting pressure on you. If you imagine a compass, the 4 arrows represent...? (North, South, East and West =P)

North and South; are your material pressures.
East and West; emotional pressures. (I can hear 'Thank you, Mr. Obvious' somewhere far away...)

So, let's start from the back.

South: your parents. Now why do I put them there? Surely we see our parents every day and well, every day since we've been born. But there's something even greater in front. And that I will come to next. ^^ But anyway; you've told me about your mother, and parents in general. And so out comes material number 1: standard.
We sometimes don't understand why parents expect good standard. Maybe it's because they want us to be independent, hardworking intellectuals?
Well sometimes trying to achieve this is not very easy. Try and put it in your mom's shoes, and maybe you won't react that strongly to her anymore. ^^ It's just based on one simple thing: experience. Parents want us to live good, successful lives based on their experience. However, they don't really have any experience in trying to get us there. =D But I'm not saying you're being nasty for rebelling.
Nope. Rebellion/Conflict is a part of all life, and solving it may not be possible sometimes. So it gets hard for both parent and child. So generally, parents just wish for that one basic material thing; while at the same time ensuring you are well provided for etc. (Are you asleep yet? ^^)

North: friends+teachers+strangers Weird combination. Why do I say this?
Friends; some are there for you. (Now I'm not trying to hint anything here...) Some are not. But that is only half of what matters. Trends, attitude, groups and styles. Everything out there requires you to be so-called attractive in that sense to get friends. Marks is a secondary issue. (=
Teachers; I guess they're pretty much the same as parents. The only thing that is different is they are the ones who really give you what you need to get the marks to please your parents. Long chain, yup. You told me about just now. So that's the kind of pressure they put. ^^
Strangers; Day to day, we meet different people who suddenly disappear like we never knew them. Easy pressure from one simple sentence can spark a lot of stress and whatnot. I guess this is just the by-chance thing. ^^ (Now I'm really talking in riddles ^^)

Good I've gone through 2 parts already! =D Now to take a short rest before continuing...

[N.B. Due to Blogger's insensitive responses to my plea to upload a video, I can't. ohwells? ^^]




Next up.

West: Peer/Relation pressures.
This basically came from what you've told me. Your friend keeps buggering you about so-and-so. And you get annoyed and pissed and yeah so on. So why west? Easy reason being when you think about it, all this influence, this way of thinking, where did it so-called originate? (= Fusion is what some people call Singapore, but I call it convert.
Relation, alot of parents pressure in different ways too. I'm not really sure of this but yeah, it counts. All other pressures on your feelings from other people goes here. So does this mean I belong here too? xD

East: Religion.
I decided to do a last minute switch here.
The world has neglected the east for awhile. Only exploiting it for expensive raw materials at cheap prices etc. Only now the east side is slowly developing. Likewise, religion is sort of in this state.
You're in worship, I know. ^^ That's real cool I would think, but as you can see. Conflict arises again, material things like where you sit, and what you play there, sometimes matters. And you're helping your friend get a keyboard spot. That's really sweet too I guess. But this is material conflict.
Even people who are very dedicated/faithful to their religion face conflict. But how they deal with it is very different. I guess you pray everyday about well, your problems. But east, again, is like one's lifetime dream. Perhaps to become a popular movie director, or maybe an expert in culinary arts. >.>
Sadly, the pull from the West drives us out of the East section. We abandon all hope of this in order to "wake up" and join the mundane society in normal boring work. Along with all of this we get pulled out of our faiths. It's a very common question so I won't bother asking. (=
So yeah, sadly this is a very weak pull. But it can become very strong if we actually look into what's behind it. And I'm sure you're well into it already. ^^

Great, I'm done.

Did I miss out on something? (=

Of course I did.

Centre: Past.
Why I switched this with religion was because; this is what's affecting you most.
Remember the crossroad? What do we reminisce about? The past.
And you still do, and I guess you might still sometimes cry about it, like what you sent me back at 5+? ^^
Everyone wants to go back to the past, and undo whatever mistakes they might have made, because surely in the end, if we didn't do stupid things like that, we'd have a perfect life right?
But once again, life is full of conflict. It is unavoidable. Even if we were able to go back and undo that mistake, something as serious would appear sooner or later down the road. What this proves is that; when such things happen, we must just accept the fact. And move along.
Not easy yes? It's pretty near impossible for one to forget his or her past. Because that's what memories are for. (= It's just how much you want to think about that matters.
And in your case, you applied it to what happened this year. See, it's like the parent. Applying experience into trying to make yourself/others a better person. The decision you've made, I cannot say it is right or wrong. Because it is neither. But what I do know is that it will form either a good or a bad memory. And of course, I wouldn't want you to have another bad one. (=
But it's decisions that make conflicts, conflicts that force more decisions, and finally, memory that is only what we will take with us.

So I'd really like to say;
Don't think so much about the centre. Sure, it is what revolves around you. Good memories, bad memories that you went for comfort when you met one. The good memory of ridding the bad one. And the worst one of ridding too much bad. Great, I'm talking in riddles again. It's rather late so please excuse me. ><
What you are doing is letting yourself be pulled by the centre pull, and then getting really hurt and stressed when you cannot solve the 4-directional pulls. As such, you're just a little helpless compass needle. On your centre resides a retainer; and you get pulled to wherever North is, although that is really conflicting since now you're getting putted to the centre. So that's a spoilt compass. ^^ Just imagine putting a magnet in the middle. (=
I really hate to put this frankly, but really, you're being taken advantage of. It's not by someone else. It's by your own memory. So yeah, try your best to remove that middle pull. Make it become nothing but a retainer to prevent you from running astray. (=

And last but not least:
If you didn't understand anything or everything;
I'll be happy to go through it again in simple terms. ^^
If I violated my first promise;
I'll be happy to execute promise no. 2. (=
And if there's anything else you need;
I'll always be here for you.

Phew. Well enjoy I guess.
Nights. ^^